Don't Let Go
by DarkAngel555
Summary: If given the choice between death and Sin, Ja'far would choose Sin every time, without hesitation. Posted on tumblr first. More information inside.


_DA: So, I've been posting quite a few things to tumblr recently, and I think they also deserve to be posted here as well, cuz I don't want you guys to miss out! I am relatively new to the Magi fandom and this is my first posted fic for this fandom! And what better way to start than with some SinJa angst! I've fallen so heavily for SinJa that I really couldn't find my way out if I tried. So expect a lot more from me!_

 _Disclaimer: (Do I really even need to do these anymore?) I don't ownnnn thiss series. I do own my own writing though!_

 _DA: Last thing, I will be posting quite a bit for this fandom over the next few days and I will also be posting this to AO3 as well. However, if you find, for whatever reason, I'm not posting fast enough, you are free to find me on tumblr! My URL is thisisthee-n-d . tumblr . com. I will be posting all of my fics there first and updating here second._

 _EDIT: Added line breaks_

* * *

Don't Let Go

"Hold on, Ja'far!"

Sin's voice was fraught with panic, golden eyes wide as they peered over the cliff's edge. Ja'far glanced up, cold trickles of sweat dripping from his temple. One of his knives was embedded in a root just near the top of the cliff, the red wire taut and trembling. His shoulder burned, arm supporting the entirety of his weight. The wires were digging deeply into his hand and arm, blood streaming from the areas were they had cut into the skin. His fingers were jammed painfully together, the bones creaking in protest. As he looked up, his kefffiyeh slipped from his head, plummeting to the raging ocean that roared threateningly below him. He didn't dare look down. But he knew that he wouldn't last long like this, his arm was already threatening to give out.

So his onyx gaze was calm, albeit pained, when he met his king's frightened eyes. Sin's tanned face was bruised and blood spattered from the previous battle, having torn the man who forced Ja'far from the cliff to shreds as well as the others who'd participated in the attack. Exhaustion hung over him, weighing down his shoulders even as he searched for a way out of this. Magoi exhaustion most likely. It had been a long battle. His dark hair tumbled over his shoulder, still glossy despite the ragged appearance of its owner. Ja'far slipped a couple of inches, his grip slick with his own blood. A grimace crossed his features, his jaw clenched. "Ja'far!" The sheer terror on Sin's face nearly made him laugh.

If he was going to die, he would rather go out like this, protecting his king, than any other way.

He had so much he wanted to say, but he knew he wouldn't be able to say it all. Sin must have seen the decision in his eyes, desperation meshing with the alarm on his face. He lowered himself onto his stomach, reaching out with a trembling hand. His fingers were mere inches from Ja'far's knife. But it wouldn't be enough, they both knew this. Even if Sin managed grab the weapon, he didn't have enough strength to pull his advisor up. And Ja'far didn't have the energy to do so himself, especially with his other hand unusable, having been broken during the initial fall. "Sin," Ja'far called, his voice composed and laced with a certain finality.

"I can-" Sin strained, pushing himself further forward. His fingers just grazed the edge of the blade, the sharp edge slicing into his fingertips. "-reach it." Tears gleamed in his eyes, though he wasn't willing to let them show. He could do it, he knew he could. But as he grabbed for the knife again, he could still only barely touch the edge.

"Sin, enough." Arm still dangling over the edge, Sin's head snapped back up to stare at his general. Hopelessness coursed through him, the tears finally trickling down his stained cheeks. Those onyx eyes were etched with sadness, framed by a face that, though drawn with pain, was soft with acceptance. A particularly harsh wave crashed against the cliff's edge, the resulting mist rising up around them. A tear splattered onto Ja'far's pale cheek, the man blinking in surprise at the sensation.

"Ja'far….I…" Silver hair tumbling in the wind, Ja'far could only smile, his hand sliding further down the wire. The ropes wrapping around his arms cut deeper into his skin at the movement, but he needed just a little while longer.

"It's okay, Sin," Ja'far reassured, watching his king fight with his own words. Sin's face was distraught, his shoulders shaking violently with repressed sobs. "I know." The knife, jostled by the rumbling waves that collided with the cliff face, began shifting in the root, the wood groaning in protest to its burden. Panic etched in those golden eyes, his arm straining to reach the loosened weapon.

"No…Ja'far! Please!" The desperate words made Ja'far's heart ache, swallowing thickly. Tears shone in his own eyes, but he was quick to blink them back.

"Keep living…Sin."

The knife, suddenly free of the root, tumbled through the air, Ja'far falling with it. He closed his eyes, a tear rolling down one cheek. Sin yelled his name above him, each cry more agonized than the last. The wind brushed against his damp skin, his arms stretching out in acceptance. His last thought was of the king he was leaving behind, the rushing winds robbing him of both oxygen and consciousness.

 _I love you, Sin._

 **MLMMLM**

"… _Could only find his headwear. I'm sorry, King Sinbad," Drakon reported, kneeling in front of the chair that his leader sat in. Sin stared blankly at him, his words only barely registering in his mind. His hands tightened around the arms of his chair, the wood creaking in protest. The newly appointed chief general, though not by Sinbad's orders, sighed at the reaction. "Yamraiha and Hinahoho are still out searching. Considering their expertise with the ocean, they stand the best chance at finding him, your majesty." He paused, a little unnerved by the glossy golden eyes that were boring holes into his head. "But as it stands now…It seems unlikely that we will find anything…I'm deeply sorry, Sinbad."_

 _Silence fell over the pair for a few moments and Drakon took the time to study his king. It was obvious that Sinbad had not slept since he stumbled back to the palace after what was supposed to be a simple outing between the king and his advisor. Dark circles surrounded his dull eyes, which normally shimmered with life. They had managed to get a broken story from him before he passed out in the palace entrance, one depicting a surprise attack on their leader that had concluded in a horrifying fashion. But upon awaking, Sinbad had barely responded to their questions, his actions mechanical at best. Nobody had been able to snap him out of it and those who tried left in tears, the one response they had been hoping to trigger in their king. If only he would cry, then perhaps he could relieve some of that pain that they all knew was throbbing in his chest. But alas, there had been no success on that front._

" _I see," Sinbad murmured woodenly. "Is there anything else?" Drakon shook his head, pulling himself onto his feet._

" _No, sir. I have nothing else to report."_

" _Dismissed. Let me know if you get any more information." Drakon inclined his head in a respectful nod before taking his leave, stopping once outside. He heaved a giant sigh before turning his gaze towards the person waiting for him outside the door, shaking his head. Masrur frowned, shooting a concerned glance towards the closed entryway. They both were disappointed at the lack of response from their ruler, but there was nothing they could do about it right now. As much as they wanted to kick start Sinbad's healing process, to force such a thing could cause an undesired response. So it was best to let it be for now._

 _Inside, Sinbad continued staring at the now empty area in front of him, his gaze hollow. This…This wasn't right. The room should be filled with activity, the empty silence broken by heavy nagging that usually grated on his nerves. He found he craved the irritating lectures, his heart aching at their absence. His eyes burned, but remained dry. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to hold on to himself if he were to give in._

Keep living…Sin.

 _Standing abruptly, Sinbad swallowed harshly, feeling his gorge rise at the words that echoed in his head. He needed something to do, right away. His jaw clenched, he strode from the room, his steps lacking their usual swagger. The soldiers standing by the door stared at him as he pushed through it, their gazes too knowing for his own comfort. Outside, the palace was bustling with activity, the menial noises easing his frayed nerves. Servants and palace staff smiled and greeted him as he walked by, as if nothing were wrong, as if nothing were missing. Was everyone just going to ignore it? Were they just going to bury what happened and live on as if_ he _had never existed? He would never allow it. Ever._

 _Feeling exhausted suddenly, Sinbad stopped and leaned against a nearby wall for support, his bronzed eyes vacant as he stared down at the floor in front of him. What if he forgot about_ him _? That thought was enough to freeze him down to his core. Was it possible? Could he forget? The possibility frightened him, his heart pounding harshly against his ribs. A hand touched his arm and he jumped, jerked out of his daze by the sensation. He glanced up at the person, his jaw clenching at the familiar green and cream robes that they were wearing._

 _The young man looked concerned, a light frown curving his mouth. A bundle of scrolls were clutched in his arms, ink stains dying the hems of his sleeves black. Ja'far used to complain all day and night about those damned stains and about how they were impossible to get out. His thoughts stopped there, the mere mention of_ his _name dragging the emotions he was trying so hard to suppress to the forefront. He couldn't break down here, not in front of the palace staff. "Are you alright, Lord Sin?" the man asked, his voice kind._

 _Sinbad tensed, wide eyes fixed on the young man's face. The words, as soft spoken as they were, froze him in place._ Sin… _Unbidden, a surge of memories flashed before him. A gentle smile, the slight curve of the mouth conveying both amusement and contentedness_ (Sin _); Cheeks, flushed with anger and speckled with dozens of lightly colored freckles_ (Sin) _; A nose, crinkled in disgust (_ Sin _); Silver locks of hair, stained dark with sweat and clumped with blood (_ Sin _); Arms, lined with callouses and indented with scars (_ Sin _); and eyes, a shimmering onyx that gleamed with tears as it gazed up at him._ Sin!

 _Thin trails of tears slipped down cadaverous cheeks, staring with horror at the man in front of him. "Lord Sin?"_

Keep living…Sin.

" _DON'T CALL ME THAT!" Sinbad roared, jerking his arm away from the man's touch. The palace worker backed off, his eyes wide with fear. The color drained from the king's features. Blood thundered in Sinbad's ears, his gaze flicking between the man and his own arm. Without another word, he ran, tears now cascading down his face without restraint. Paying no mind to the concerned calls of his staff, he ran hard and fast, not even stopping when he cleared the palace entirely. His lungs burned, his chest heaving. He didn't know where he was going, and frankly, he didn't care; he just needed to get out of there._

 _When he finally stopped, he found himself at a clearing in the forest, a cliff's edge jutting temptingly out into the sea. Vision blurring, he could only stare at the ocean beyond, the same ocean that had stolen from him that which he loved most. With a defeated scream, he sank to his knees, his body shaking violently as sobs were finally ripped from his very being. His fingers carved deep crevices into the dirt, his tears rolling off his face to spatter onto the ground below._

 _He'd fucked up. He couldn't save him. This entire situation was his fault. He'd been literally right there, mere millimeters from grabbing onto the unstable weapon, but Ja'far, his best friend and probably more, slipped away, practically through his fingers. And he could only watch him fall, unable to do anything but watch it fucking happen. He slammed a fist into the ground, pain racing up his arm from the force of the punch. Gasping desperately through his sobs, he curled over further, his forehead pressing into the soft dirt._

Keep living…Sin.

 _The voice that rang through his head only made him cry harder. "I'm trying, Ja'far," he sobbed. "I really am. But it's so hard. So hard…" He dragged himself to his feet, staggering over to the cliff's edge to gaze down into the churning sea. It would only take one step…Just one. The ease in which those thoughts occurred to him caused hysterical laughter to bubble up his throat. It was then that he realized, he wanted to die. He didn't want to live in a world where Ja'far wasn't by his side._

 _His foot shook as he moved it off the stable ledge, letting it hover over the open space in front of him. For a few moments, he truly considered it, just ending everything. Retracting his foot, he stepped back, away from the cliff. He just couldn't do it. This country, the land that he had built with his very hands, he couldn't let it go to waste. Sinbad knew he was the driving force of Sindria as its ruler and he couldn't throw that away because of the death of one man, even if that man was Ja'far. His hands came up to grab at his bangs, dropping to his knees once more. A cry lurching from his throat, his eyes squeezed shut, unwilling to watch the tempting waters anymore._

 _And so he would continue on, no matter how much he hurt…for Ja'far…_

 **MLMMLM**

His world felt as if it were collapsing around him, even when he snapped himself from those thoughts of what his life would become.

"NO! JA'FAR!" Sin screamed, his throat tearing at the strength of his cry. Tears streamed down his face, dripping off his chin to drop into the ocean below. Ja'far held his gaze for several moments before closing his eyes, completely accepting of his fate. Sin's arm dangled over the edge of the cliff, fingers straining out as if to catch him. His other hand was clamped around the cliff, the rock's edges digging into his palm. This…couldn't be. He would be completely lost without Ja'far.

 _No_.

This wouldn't happen. He wouldn't allow it.

Eyes narrowed and jaw clenched, his hand curled into a fist, baring the silver bracelet encircling his wrist. "Focalor!" He channeled what remained of his power into the metal vessel, the sigil shining brightly. Pushing himself up into a crouch, Sin launched from the cliff, letting his eyes drift shut as Focalor's power washed over him. He would only be able to hold this form for a minute or so, at best. But it would be enough. He would make it be enough. Mouth a determined slash across his face, he reached out, directing the wind upwards so as to slow Ja'far's decent.

His body throbbed in unison, the drain on his strength nearly too much for him in this state. Sin stubbornly clung to his equip despite this, refusing to give up his one chance. The wind burned at his cheeks, his violet hair flying back as he sped downwards. Stray feathers breezed upwards with the gusts, whipping around with the strong currents. The more strength he relinquished, the more he seemed to shed the feathers. He _would_ make it. Blood seeped from his lips, its metallic tang bitter on his tongue. Just…a little further.

Sin's hand clasped tightly around the limp one of his advisor, relief bursting within him at the warmth of the man's touch. Without wasting another moment, he pulled Ja'far to his chest, wrapping both arms around the smaller frame. The equip form finally began to fade away, the wind losing intensity now that his strength was not being fed to it. Maneuvering so that he was below his advisor, Sin released the power, his grip tightening around Ja'far. The man was unconscious, his body battered and bruised. The king knew that he was approaching the same state, that last push with Focalor stealing what remained of his magoi.

As golden eyes disappeared behind his eyelids, they hit the ocean, water splashing up to encase them in its cold grasp. The impact forced the air from Sin's lungs, the oxygen bubbling up to the surface. Stunned momentarily, he allowed himself to sink, his grip loosening around Ja'far. The water was cold on his skin, but almost soothing to the touch. He was…peaceful. The sunlight filtered in through the dark waters, illuminating the nearby area as his eyes cracked open. A flash of pale silver caught his gaze, so bright against the darkness. Ja'far had slipped from his fingers, floating slowly away from him. Small bubbles escaped from between his lax lips, bringing with them the air that was necessary for survival. Eyes snapping wide open, Sin surged up towards the surface, snatching Ja'far back into his arms. He broke free of the water with a ragged gasp, spitting water from his mouth. Though his body ached and he was exhausted, he was alive. A quick check of the limp form next to him confirmed that Ja'far was as well.

A weak smile fluttering across his face, he continued swimming, eyes peeled for a nearby shore.

The vision floated away with the waves, destroyed by Sin's success.

 **MLMMLM**

Ja'far groaned softly upon arising to consciousness, his head throbbing. Sunlight streaked in through his cracked eyelids, nearly blinding in its intensity. His clothing felt stiff and rough against his skin, cheeks burning in the harsh heat. Fingers twitching in the soft sand, he bit back a wince, the injuries trailing up his arm stinging sharply at the movement. The quiet roaring of waves washing up onto shore filled his ears, the cold water licking at his bare feet. He blinked up at the clear blue sky, staring at the few puffy white clouds eclipse the sun as they drifted by. He was alive.

Wait…

What the hell? How was he alive?!

Onyx eyes flying wide open, he jerked upright in his shock only to sag back when his head swam. He propped himself up on his elbow, allowing his aching broken hand to rest on the beach. The other reached up to rub at his forehead, grimacing at the grit caked across his skin. He froze suddenly, his gaze travelling slowly down his arm. It was bare. The wire that normally encircled the limb was gone, leaving thick callouses and deep lacerations in its absence.

Not only was he confused, now he was a little worried. What was he supposed to do without his weapons? Taking a deep breath, he lowered his hand, letting his gaze roam across the expanse of land that he was resting on. The beach shone in the sunlight, the deep blue of the ocean glittering just beyond the white shores. He wasn't sure where exactly he had ended up, but it seemed as if he'd made it to one of the smaller islands that surrounded Sindria. That was a relief at least.

Footsteps crunched in the sand behind him, Ja'far's body tensing at the sound. His fingers automatically reached for the blades that were normally secured by his wrists, only to brush against skin instead. Ja'far supposed he could fight unarmed, but his chances of success while injured were slim. Running was likely his best chance. As he shifted to get up, a voice halted his movements.

"Ja'far, you're awake!" Sin called happily, rushing over to his advisor's side. Ja'far could only blink at the man, those golden eyes glimmering as they looked at him. The king's tanned face was covered in scrapes and bruises, his bottom lip split. The long purple hair that was draped over his shoulder was a disheveled mess, strands clumped with mud and grime. A few fruit were cradled in one of his arms, jostling slightly when the man knelt. But a wide grin stretched across his face, obviously pleased that Ja'far was awake. One of Sin's eyebrows rose at the lack of response. "Uh, Ja'far?" One of his hands rose to poke the younger man, attempting to get a rise from him.

"What the hell did you do?!" Ja'far yelled, slapping Sin's hand away before it could reach him. Everything made a horrifying amount of sense now. Of course Sin had done something to save him, when he was supposed to be safely in Sindria. A quick scan of the man also confirmed that Sin had confiscated his weapons, the scarlet wires entwined around the cloth around his waist and the knives dangling at his sides. "Why did you jump after me?!" Anger boiled in Ja'far's expression, his onyx eyes blazing with the emotion. Taking his weapons was probably a good move on Sin's part or his ass would be buried in the sand already. As it was, Ja'far's free hand was twitching as if to attack.

"I rescued you, Ja'far. You wouldn't be alive otherwise!" Sin shot back, his grin slipping off of his face. Ja'far's eyes narrowed, the flush to his cheeks not entirely due to sunburn anymore.

"By jumping after me?! Are you deliberately obtuse today or are you always this dumb? Because the way I look at it, one government official is worth much less than a king! What you did was not worth the risks you took!"

"Don't say that." Sin's words were surprisingly quiet, a shadow crossing over his expression. Ja'far didn't notice, his mind fully focused on his rage.

"It's the truth, Sin! Think about your kingdom before doing something this stupid! Hell, think about yourself! I never want you to die for my sake!" Ja'far's tone grew sharp, a faint film of tears lining the bottom of his eyes. Breathing heavily, he stared at his king, a scowl slashing across his face. His gaze finally dropped, studying the way his broken hand appeared in the sand. He'd been so scared, so scared looking up at Sin's terrified expression and knowing he couldn't fix it. "I would never forgive myself if-"

A pair of lips cut him off, pressing softly against his own. Gentle fingers lifted his chin, a hand resting on his shoulder where his robe had slipped. Onyx eyes wide, he froze against the touch. His mind screeched to a halt, unable to process what was happening. But soon, his eyes drifted shut, melting into the kiss in a way he had only dreamed of.

When they finally parted, Sin rested his forehead on Ja'far's, his golden eyes darkened to a dull bronze. "I thought I was going to lose you, Ja'far. I-I knew what would happen if I did." Sin trailed off, drawing in a shaky breath. "And I couldn't let that happen. Not now, nor ever again. So now that I have you, I am never letting you go." Ja'far's mouth fell open, as if to speak, but he only darted forward to capture his king's lips once more. Sin responded eagerly, his hands sliding up to comb into the silver locks of hair. Ja'far drew back, his gaze earnest.

"You never have to."

* * *

 _DA: I always make these so sappy at the end. Whoops. But nothing makes me happier than watching these two dorks make out so…uh….expect this a lot. Hehe. I said everything I wanted to say in my earlier author's note cuz I know nobody reads the ending notes. But if you want more of my angsty/sappy SinJa stuff, then just look me up on tumblr. I think I've got three fics up right now, and one of them is a longer fic that I'm currently in the process of writing._

 _I hope you enjoyed this story! Leave a review if you really liked it!_

 _May your hearts stay strong,_

 _DarkAngel555_


End file.
